My friends Jazz Shaw and Doug Mataconis have posted their bullshit predictions for 2012, so I feel compelled to do the same.
First lets look on the world stage. Arab Spring has turned out to be Springtime for Radical Islamists and not at all for liberty and democracy.
1. Egypt will have a one man (and maybe woman), one vote, one time election and elect the Muslim Brotherhood, with the blessing of the Egyptian military. The new regime will terminate the peace treaty with Israel, escalating tensions. Israel threatens to retake Sinai as retaliation.
2. Islamists solidify power in Libya and Tunisia. Sharia law becomes the order of the day, and European tourists stay away from popular resorts in Tunisia in droves, as alcohol is banned and women are forced to wear a burqini to the beach.
3. Obama abandons Afghanistan and negotiates the return of the Taliban to power in Afghanistan. Al-Qaeda declares victory over the the decadent Americans, and moves back in.
4. Iran has another series of explosions at nuclear sites of unknown origin, and it's bomb building program is set back. Of course it will be the JOOOOOS in "occupied Palestine" who are blamed, probably correctly.
5. North Korea will continue to be a basket case under the latest Super-Dooper Leader. People will still starve, the military will get fed thanks to the kindness of South Korea and the west. China continues to prop up the DPRK just enough to allow them to make trouble for its neighbors.
6. China, recognizing the weakness of the Obama administration, will ratchet up pressure on Taiwan. There will be several naval exercises in the South China Sea, just to let the Philippines, Vietnam, and Taiwan, just whose property this is. Obama does nothing.
7. Islamists in west Africa countries like Nigeria and Cote d'Ivoire continue their jihad on Christians. The world yawns.
If you haven't slit your wrists yet, here are my predictions for things going on closer to home:
1. America will be attacked by Islamist terrorists just before the November 2012 election in another spectacular 9/11 style attack. Obama tells that Americans that Islam is a religion of peace, apologizes for Americas perceived transgressions against Islam and asks for restraint.
2. Mitt Romney will be the Republican candidate for President, selecting Tim Pawlenty as his VP running mate. The Dull and Duller campaign will lead to a GOP loss after the successful Al-Qaeda October Surprise attack and a weak Republican response. The Republicans retain the House, and retake the Senate however.
3. Obama Care's individual mandate is upheld in the Supreme Court. Justice Kagan does not recuse, and Justice Kennedy votes with the majority.
4. The economy remains anemic with only a 2% GDP growth for 2012. President Obama demands another $500B stimulus package aimed at union and government payouts. Gridlock in Congress prevents any action on the proposal.
5. There will be no budget passed in 2012. Continuing resolutions with threats of imminent government shutdowns start getting old. Congressional approval drops to a new low.
So there you have it. I'll leave you with the Happy Happy Joy Joy Song to ring in what will be an eventful 2012.